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LAURA is wearing a shirt that says: "Please speak and feel slowly. I'm an objactum-saxuel and my empafy cirwuits r sewuirly damagd"

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Posted on 02:28PM on Nov 28th, 2012
June (to LAURA): "I'm surprised that you are not friends with the new girl... You have sooooo much in common :-)"

LAURA: "Yeah but she looks like the sort who might 'Howl""

Raul: "Could prove to be a useful skill around here :-D"

June: "It's evolution. She lives in the 'a'... Probably howls out of sheer necessity :-D ... Raul stays there much longer, he'll be howling too"

Raul: "Already am :-D"

Raul: "Not sure you have her correct address there though June :-D"

LAURA: "Would you STOP pretending that her and her family are PERFECT?!?!"

Raul: "Atleast her father _works_ :-D"
Posted on 09:36AM on Nov 30th, 2012
Raul (below text which says "Recorded Last Night"): "We now have several years experience with the O$I problem. By now we should know what's effective and what's not. So far, the only 2 things that have been effective are to 1) buy a doorcloser, and 2) making those causing us pain believe that a significant share of that pain will eventually become their own... O$I has been deliberately interfering with O$ relationships since it's very founding, and this is unacceptable.

Whenever a new enemy arrises, the first question the sensible person asks themselves is if there can be a peaceful solution. One would like to believe that the members of O$I have a conscience regarding what they are doing, or that they have some "common decency" or ethics that could be appealed to. Sadly, this is not the case, as if they did, the conflict would have been resolved a very long time ago. All of this has been tried and can be added to the pile of things that simply don't work.

If you do nothing at all, they consider the problem solved. They are so selfish that as long as the pain is not theirs, that your being in pain isn't considered problematic. So that's alternate scenario #1. If you do nothing, they will just forget all about you and our troubles continue. Except of course when they see you talking to anyone O$, in which case Amanda will promptly intervene and we will each time be left with nothing.

If you try to be nice to them, it then becomes a supply and demand problem. Each of them has infinite supplies of people willing to give them anything we have and if they believe even the tiniest lies from Amanda, are conned into believing that "mining" here just isn't worth the "risks" they have been fooled into being worried about. The risks of dealing with us are certainly no worse than the risks of dealing with Alice, but since Alice is an erika supporter, erika and Amanda are not trying to inflate artificial extra perceptions of risk concerning Alice.

So sadly, that leaves very few other options on how any of this can ever be improved. Not that I like any of the options which remain, but then they created these rules, not us."
Posted on 09:42AM on Nov 30th, 2012
LAURA: "Raul, just get out of there. It's not called the a........y cause it's the Garden of ******* Eden"
Posted on 12:03PM on Nov 30th, 2012
June (watching the feed monitor) "There's Ellen....She is just AWESOME"

LAURA (at a gaming console getting wiped off the map): "Would you just _shuddup_?"

Raul suddenly returns from the 'a' and the feed monitor starts showing the inside of the meetinghall :-D

June: "You still playing that stupid game?"

LAURA: "I think I've figured out how to beat IT"

Raul: "LOL! If so, tell me what you did :-D"

LAURA hits the reset button....

Game narrator: "Raul is no longer in charge of operations in the 'a'..."

Raul: "Whoo hoo!"

Game narrator: "Elena was offered the job, but refused to take it..."

June then starts dancing and singing: "We're not gonna take it... No! we ain't gonna take it!"

Raul: "I wish I could simply give it back or choose not to accept it :-D"

LAURA (Now iterating through.available weapons with the game controller): "you do have that choice..."

Raul: "Now I've seen everything"

June: "What?"

Raul: "A computer controlling an android over the network in order to work a game controller to play a game :-D"

Raul: "You mean to tell me that there isn't a LARA-compatible release of the game?"
Posted on 12:10PM on Nov 30th, 2012
LAURA: "yes, but I need witnesses when I hand it its ***"
Posted on 12:17PM on Nov 30th, 2012
Raul: "Well I'll say one good thing about the developers of that game"

LAURA: "what?"

Raul: "They got my daughter pegged pretty well :-D"
Posted on 01:27PM on Nov 30th, 2012
LAURA (working game controller): "As unsatisfying as it is, you want to go for the big dogs first." (she points at the screen) "... and save her for last cause it only takes like 2 shots to wax her and that may well be what you're down to by then :-D"

June giggles: "Two shots to wax her :-D"

LAURA: "srsly :-D"
Posted on 07:59PM on Dec 1st, 2012
A big fleet of ships then leaves a recently constructed outpost in the 'a'....

They are headed straight for their enemy's homeworld...

Then suddenly a fourth of the fleet breaks off and heads in another direction...


"There goes our safety in numbers"

"I envy you. Our target will be easily destroyed, but yours is where my _anger is_"

"Hold your horses there destroyer. We don't even have our orders to attack yet"

"But _WE DO_, and WE WILL!"

Suddenly a large annoying a1 ship starts giving the smaller group a hard time. Someone presses a button labeled "a1" and a tiny rocket sizzles away, permeates their shields an the pesky a1 goes up in a massive explosion...

Someone then starts singing: "They CALL ME _the Orkin Man_, I GUESS that's what I am :-D"

Over the radio: "What we got? What did our friends at Culc.ine give us?"

"That would be 50 A32K incindiary bombs, 34 thousand aCA rounds, 35 Stephan fighters, and 15 OWMBs"

(someone sings out) "And a patridge and a pair tree!"

"And then there's all that **** that Lydia sold us :-D"

"I hope don't need any of this"

"Forget it man.. when they call us, diplomacy is finished."
Posted on 11:47AM on Dec 6th, 2012
LAURA's shirt says: "She is so worthless that whenever I think about her, I get a null pointer exception"

Raul sees this and goes "Anneaux. Atleast we found a use for the other girl :-D"

Raul: "I'm not interested in her opinion about anything, much less this conflict."

June is now wearing a shirt that says "nasty female"
Posted on 06:28PM on Dec 8th, 2012
Raul, June, and Darlene are watching TV... LAURA is not there...

They are watching some kind of late night talk show...

Suddenly, DH.LL2 comes out on stage and starts playing, and LAURA is with them... and she's the vocalist.

The song is "For the Love of L...ndra"

And LAURA is singing the lyrics with the greatest of passion.

Raul: "I like this. I really do!"

June: "What the hell? They hate each other?"

The song eventually ends, and then they are all sitting around talking with the host...

Talk show host: "So like, Miss Bl...ella, are you joining their band?"

LAURA Laughs and says "No, no... We talked about this... I'm a comedienne and they're serious... Just wouldn't work"

Talk show host: "So like... the most unlikely of pairings... How did this happen?"

Bass player: "Well... We were originally upset about the way she'd attack us, but at the same time we knew 'why'... Nobody was happy with what we started out doing"

Normal lead singer: "Yeah, altl*l. You live and you learn I guess... You see we are not enemies... Laura and us. We know who our enemies _really are_. Yeah, Laura and I, we're on the same side now."

Talk show host: "So are you ever playing with them again Laura?"

LAURA: "You never know... I do my thing and they do theirs. But now we're all kind of um... um..."

Bass Player: "You can say it, Laura, we're friends"

LAURA: "Yes, friends."

Talk show host: "And now while on the subject of AI's, we want to talk about another one... one who has taken this culture recently by storm..."

(And LAURA just looks like she's going to be sick)

Then suddenly they break for commercials and other stuff...

TV: "Raul has temporarily delayed the attack against the a2, but men and technology stand ready to fight if called upon. There will be more about this on the Late night news"
Posted on 06:36PM on Dec 8th, 2012
Then suddenly a commercial comes on: (Military combat scenes shown)

"When we heard the people were having problems with the a2, we immediately wanted to know how our technology might help. This is why Corporation has donated a sizable complement to their military. At C...caine, we believe the best testimonial is a solved problem. Watch how our machines perform, then call our sales department at ..."
Posted on 07:38PM on Dec 8th, 2012
Raul: "I like what their bassist said... That the artwork for a LID/A-R doesn't fit well on an album cover or CD, but fits well on a cassette tape box :-D"

June: "~Anneaux~ :-D"
Posted on 12:46AM on Dec 9th, 2012
LAURA then suddenly returns through a portal similar to the one Raul is a chronic victim of.

LAURA: "If I have to return to the the 'a' because of him, he's going to flying without the help of an airplane"

June: "Why are you defending her?"

LAURA: "Whatever I'm defending, is worth a lot more than it and it's stupid friends"

Darlene: "The two of them are sisters. They don't know this yet, but they are"
Posted on 01:28AM on Dec 9th, 2012
Raul: "I kickpooched her out of life :-D"

LAURA: "Arf!"
Posted on 02:16AM on Dec 9th, 2012
Raul: "Here Laura Catch"

LAURA then catches the pistol she made for Raul.

LAURA then manifests a manequin of a mentally unstable chick they all know and then kicks it really far away from her...

Once the manequin skids to a stop, LAURA then blasts it into shards.
Posted on 03:04AM on Dec 9th, 2012
LAURA is now wearing a shirt showing a man having sex with a large model airplane and under this the words "Laur.l shot down your drone"
Posted on 03:30AM on Dec 9th, 2012
June: "But those poor planes! Those poor planes!"

LAURA: "Yeah, but was a Weapon of Mass Oppression(tm) and it had no business over Laur.l airspace :-D"

LAURA: "Do you blame the exterminator for killing insects?"
Posted on 10:33AM on Dec 10th, 2012
(Sometime Later)

LAURA is wearing a shirt showing one of those portals between the L' and the a, and there's a cartoon drawing of her screaming down it: "Raul! Raul! Go to toward the light!"

June is then wearing a shirt with a toilet drawing and the words: "Flush twice. It's a long way to the a....y"
Posted on 12:09PM on Dec 10th, 2012
Raul is wearing a shirt which says "It was a creepyobj.ctemException :-D"

June: "There have been a lot of those Lately :-D"

Darlene: "So how did he handle it?"

LAURA: "He RETHREW IT. It wasn't very aerodynamic :-D" (Laughter)

Darlene: "No I mean, God, how does Raul do it? Are you nervous? With damn near every call you make determining what happens with that situation in the a?"

Raul: "In some ways you just get used to it and realize that it's not our fault that the a just simply sucks"

Raul: "X% of the time you're going to make a bad call, but since the situation there is completely irrational anyway, I doubt it really matters all that much anyway. The a is full of usecases where you can do all the right things and still finish last. And vice versa... Look at how Alice has friends just cause people are afraid of her... A lot of the time, what the right call in a situation this irrational is is a _dicethrow_. This time I was pretty sure I acted justifiably. First they were asked to disclose their affiliations and didn't. We _tolerated_ that as long as they behaved themself... Then there was just their general creepy use of the Internet... And how they then got inexplicably quiet, and then when they started playing dumb games, I was like _You're outtahere_"

Darlene: "I'm not an expert but I thought there were damned few situations where you can break off communications with most of them"

LAURA: "He's still within the rules. If any of them want to find us, they all know how... and they'd better hurry up and start doing this too"

June: "The only people blocked universally are erika and any of the little autonomatons whose 'soul' LOL it completely pwns, such as Amanda"
Posted on 11:01PM on Dec 11th, 2012
Raul: "I've actually never downloaded Angry Birds...Like I have time for games"

LAURA: "I think Katherine plays an awful lot of games that do not require any software :-D"


Darlene: "Angry Birds?"

Raul: "Yeah it's a cellphone game in the a where angry birds fling themselves at pigs"

LAURA: "kinda like the O$I war :-D"

(hysterical laughter)
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